Life is full of ups and downs, twists and turns, laughter and tears. Some people enjoy their life, some hate it. While some live their life others just drag their life, with utter sincerity, until death.
A lot of people suffer twists in their relationships with their friends and families. Some can overcome due to their earnest efforts to rebuild the relationship. Some give up after a few trials.
It’s all about your outlook— your point of view and general attitude to life. It’s not the trouble or the crisis that is making you suffer; it’s the way you define and treats the crisis that makes it easy or difficult.
Coming to an easier term, you need to change your attitude. This is going to fix most of your problems and dilemmas of life.
First, you need to be sure that you still have to learn. There are so many easy and good things that successful people know and most of us don’t.
Let’s talk about them.
Love People for Who They Are
This is the first thing that I have always wanted to tell everyone I love. You need to love people for who they are and not who we want them to be, not who we think they can be. Love them simply in their present condition— just as they are now.
It’s not easy.
We often have our expectations about others— we want others to be what we want them to like. Subconsciously we strongly want that others should meet our standards of choice.
This keeps us away from the pure people, the earnest people, the easy-going real people who are just what they are.
But when we succeed to love someone for who they are we see how they become the greatest, the most inspired version of themselves.
The truth, the reality is that we don’t know about the silent battles fought by those we see from outside. We don’t see the hours of suffering and the irreversible losses they have endured. What is more important, most of the time the hidden wisdom in their hearts go unnoticed just because we didn’t ask for them.
When you understand the above simple facts it will humanize your role models, flatten your egos, and give you reasons to treat every person with compassion and kindness.
Don’t Go for Attracting Love; First Give Love
You need to be realistic. The real force and the real pull of love start functioning when you start giving it. It’s a simple give and take system which starts from you showing it and ends with the return, in most cases, with more power and more taste.
To know more about how to internalize this into your system visit https://3minuteaffirmations.com/
When You are Positive, You Find Positive Things in Others
And you start receiving positive attitudes and behaviors from others. It’s all about how you explain it.
Would you like a person who is skeptical and cynical to you? No? Why not? The simplest reason is that you want others to believe you. You want them to believe that you are not motivated purely by self-interest. You want them to believe that you have sincerity and integrity.
That’s exactly what others expect from you. People understand your attitude to them very well and they try to return what you give them.
There is another aspect of being positive. Perhaps all of us have seen small boys quarreling with one another and within moments playing peacefully together again. How do they do that? They fight only when they think others are wrong, not because they think others are their enemy. They are always friends. They forgive their friends. They compromise. They unite and reunite to achieve their common goal (a football match, for example). What else is left to explain being positive?
Don’t Complain; Listen to Others
For every rude behavior of people, there is a reason behind it.
Once I watched a video of a teacher who punished one of his students for being late to class most of the days. He had a plan to expel him from the class until, one day, he saw that the poor boy had to carry his disabled father from home to the doctor’s regularly and just half an hour before the class started. Most of the time that was the reason for his being late.
We often miss the untold stories, the hidden lights of a person who we think is not good enough, or can not be loved. In most cases, they are sufferers. Listen to their stories and you’ll know what could be the perfect alternative to complaining.
It may be your mother who spent many sleepless nights nursing you during your infancy. It may be your father who refused to buy new shoes for years just to support his family with his limited income.
There are so many of them. The soft words of comfort from your friend, the lofty, energizing speech of your teacher, even the sweet smile of your neighbor— everything filled your life and made you what you are now. So many people have contributed to your life which you can never possibly repay. The only option left for you is to be grateful.
What happens when you are grateful?
You start behaving more softly, more positively, and more humbly.
The power of softness, positiveness, and humbleness?
In a word, they are enough to change the world around you. You are reborn with the power to attract more love and positive relationships from all the persons you know.
Remember the Past and Live in the Present
Most of the unsuccessful persons have this problem: they remember the past and this makes them sad and hopeless. There are two ways past can demoralize us:
First, the past was good and the present is not just as they had expected. This feeling quickly makes their present life bleak and dull. What they forget is when there are downs in the present, there must be ups in the future. The best thing is that you still live to build up the brightest part of your life.
The second pessimistic thought about the past is the memories of mistakes and being betrayed and robbed. This breaks their heart. They could have grown out of this destructive attitude only if they could take past events as ‘lessons of life’ that thousands of books could not have provided. They are not just memories; they are treasures that millions of dollars could not have bought.
Mind Your Language
So many times you might have faced such situations where someone was hurt from something you did not mean to say. It was perhaps a slip of tongue. It was perhaps a wrong use of a word. It could even be the unaware tone of your voice that made them think what you never have wanted to say.
Remember, the power of words is enormous and unlimited. You can kill a person with your words. Same way, you can bring centuries of a quarrel between two families to an end with your words.
The more careful you can be with your words the more love and affection you can draw from others.
There is no short-cut to draw love and positive relationships.
Following the tips is not as easy as passing an exam by learning some formula. In practical life, each of the points may take months to internalize. But once you fit them in your outlook and behavior you’ll see how dramatically things have started to change around you.